The Winter Coat Scenario

It is a cold winter day, around 30°F, and you are going to a birthday party outside in a playground. Your child is excited to go but refuses to put on their coat. What would you do?

Please stand up and move to the side of the room representing your choice.

Follow-up Questions:

• What if the temperature is 20°F? 10°F?
• What if this is their best friend’s birthday, and the child and parents are deeply upset if you do not come?

The Broken Chromebook

You have approved for your child to bring their Chromebook home. Your child has a table or desk to work on, but they prefer to use it on the couch or floor. You don’t mind this, but you have to keep reminding them not to leave it out when they are done. One day, they leave it on the couch, and without knowing it is there, someone sits on it, and it breaks. They have enough money saved to pay for a new Chromebook, but they have other plans for this money. What would you do?

Please stand up and move to the side of the room representing your choice.

Your child has been wishing for a special toy. They received this toy as a birthday present and were excited to bring it to school. They left it on the floor when they went outside during free time. Unfortunately, when they come back inside, another learner accidentally steps on the toy, ruining it.

(For older children, consider an expensive piece of jewelry or gadget instead of a toy)

What would you do?

• Nothing. Just listen and be empathic.
• Tell them it’s a learning experience, and move on.
• Buy them another toy.
• Call the other learner’s mom to ask her to buy a new toy.
• Something else.

Your child comes to you very upset. They have been annoyed with their close friend, Sarah, and to vent their frustration, they had a gripe session with a third friend about Sarah. The third friend then told everyone all of the mean things your child said about Sarah, and everyone, especially Sarah, is mad and thinks your child is mean. To top it off, Sarah’s mom is your close friend.

What would you do?

• Nothing. Just listen and be empathic.
• Talk to Sarah’s mom and apologize.
• Encourage your child to have a conflict resolution with Sarah.
• Something else.

Your child has read a badge book borrowed from the school library. They brought it home to make progress in the book, but they misplaced it, and after checking many places, they had no idea where it could be. They are stressed because the book is lost and want to finish writing their review and mark the challenge for their badge.

What would you do?

• Nothing. Let them handle the situation with the related systems in the studio (they will have to pay for a new book from the Hero Bucks).
• Buy them a new book.
• Something else.

Your child forgets their lunch box at school almost every day, including the thermos and utensils.

What would you do?

• Send them with a different lunch box every day.
• Go inside when you come to pick them up and look for the missing items.
• Let them go without a lunch box (whatever it might mean in your family food routine).
• Have them pay for it with their money.
• Something else.

Your child has received a special toy figure from their aunt for their birthday. Their aunt had to go out of their way to get this figure, which was not cheap. Your child is so excited to bring it to school and show it to their friends, but when they come home they happily tell you that they traded the figure away to a friend for a little stuffy and some slime. They were very excited about the trade, but as the day goes on, they start to have regrets.

(For older children, consider an expensive piece of jewelry or gadget traded for a snack)

What would you do?

• Nothing. Just listen and be empathic.
• Tell them it’s a learning experience, and move on.
• Buy them another toy.
• Call the other learner’s mom to ask her to bring the toy back.
• Tell your child to ask for a conflict resolution with the other learner.
• Something else.

Your child keeps complaining about the same learner but refuses to ask for a conflict resolution with them.

What would you do?

• Just listen to them and tell them you trust them to solve the problem.
• Tell them to stop complaining if they won’t take action.
• Call the other learners’ parents.
• Something else.

Follow-up Questions:

• What if it was a minor annoyance?
• What if it was a serious conflict?

Your child excitedly agreed to a trade with another learner—”If you bring me your cool gel pens, I’ll bring you a special keychain.” But after your child brought their item, the other learner never followed their promise. Now, your child feels hurt and cheated.

What would you do?

• Tell them it’s a learning experience and move on.
• Encourage them to talk to the other learner and ask for their item.
• Step in and speak to the other learner yourself.
• Something else.

Follow-up Questions:

• What if the item was worth $1?
• What if it was worth $20?
• What if this learner had done this before?

Your child hasn’t completed any Core Skills and has earned zero badges in the past two weeks.

What would you do?

• Let them experience the consequences.
• Sit down with them to create a plan.
• Require a certain amount of work before allowing free time.
• Something else.

Follow-up Question:

• What if it had been three months?

Your child earns an allowance each Sunday for doing chores. You see them spend their money quickly on trinkets and treats, and each week, they run into an issue when they want to do something with friends (which you are happy for them to have social time), but they don’t have the money to do it.

What would you do?

• Give them the money.
• Not give them the money.